Well its that time of year again when the ridiculous crazy Billboard Music Awards are on and my brother and I are going to see how much we can actually get through before either falling asleep or just turning off due to terrible performances. I will live blog my/our feelings here, hopefully it will make up for my blog being pretty inactive the last few weeks. I am back. For real now.
-Okay the awards just started. There has already been a Wayne Newton spotting and they are giving the opening performance to wait for it... Bruno Mars (PC must be stoked. ha). He is out there looking like Michael Jackson in the early 80s in a fly red suit singing a song that I have yet to hear but sure I will hear on the radio tomorrow. At least this guy is singing live and is somewhat talented. Im afraid that I will not be able to say that a lot tonight. Bruno gets a 7 out of 10 and that is because his live band behind him was amazing.
-Waring. I just saw the lineup and I have never heard of half the performers. This could get interesting.
-Here comes host Tracy Morgan. His suit is ridiculous. He is not being funny. Keep the music coming Tracy. Okay he just made some pretty good Taylor Swift points. Bonus points. Holy crap Wayne Newtons face is not moving. Lay off the botox people!
-Shania Twain is presenting 'Best Rap Album'. Weird choice Billboard. The winner is Nicki Minaj. Considering she was up against such heavy hitters as PSY i'm not surprised but as Rick just laughed 'She is so talent-less'. Truth brother. He also does a pretty great impression of her. Ask him one day.
-Here is a performance from Selena Gomez. I'm going to guess she is lip syncing. Yup. I am correct. Automatically deducted 2 points. She is doing some terrible Bollywood performance. I just don't get it. I'm already over it. 4 out of 10. Gave her two points because I liked her outfit.
-Next is The Band Perry. They are that country group that sang "If I Die Young" (not a huge fan of that song). This one is a little bit more rocking and I'll give them bonus points because they are all playing live and their lead singer can actually sing. Also good use of lasers. Not their fault this is not my type of music so I give them a solid 7 out of 10. Not bad.
-Here comes Carly Rae Jepson. The 'Call Me Maybe' girl. She is announcing Icona Pop singing my favorite song of the moment. 'I Love It'. I know that this song only has four sentences but I can't help but dance. "I crashed my car into a bridge... I don't care... I love it!" Rick and I are both dancing. I don't really even care that they are lip syncing they still get a 9 out of 10 due to the amazingness of the song.
-Oh snap here is PSY. I thought this guys 5 minutes ran out. He is here to introduce Chris Brown. He automatically automatically gets a 0 out of 10. We are both booing the tv screen. He does not deserve this airplay, not to mention the performance is terrible. Ugh. I won't even waste words on this fool. This is an actual screenshot from his performance. No joke.
-Side note that Orianthi (guitarist) is playing with Chris Brown now. I'm so disappointed in you girl.
-Avril Lavigne makes her way back to the public eye to give 'Most Downloaded Song'... its so 2013. She actually looks great, now if we can work on her making songs that sound different then every song she has ever made we will make progress. Winner is 'Call Me Maybe' for Carly Rae Jepson. How is that song still getting awards?
-Not surprised that they got Macklemore and Ryan Lewis to perform their smash hit "Thrift Shop". While I'm so over this song I will give this man credit for doing it all independently on his own accord. Like him or not this is the new way music is going to come at us. Embrace it. FYI His outfit is completely ridiculous. Even with that I give him 8 out of 10 easily.
-Oh nice Kid Rock is here to present. I haven't seen him in a while and even though his music is not in my taste I do have a lot of musical respect for the man. He also just got a 100 out of 10 for the line "Lets give it up for people lip syncing with pre-recorded music". HAHAHA. Winner and still champion. Kid Rock. Who cares if he is so drunk that he can barely stand he is my winner of the night. Laughing so hard right now. He is giving another rap award out, I don't know half the people nominated. Macklemore wins. He thanks 'Goodwill and Valley Village' haha. Loved the entire last 5 minutes of this broadcast.
-Next performance is Taylor Swift. Rick hates her. I love her. We are debating back and forth. Yes of course this performance is one of the most cheesy things I've ever seen but at least she is singing live and looks great. Rex from Entourage is spotted in the audience! ha. Good spot Rick. I give Taylor a solid 7 out of 10. Also bonus points for having the Jabawockeez perform with you.
-Have no idea who these people are on the stage. Also have no idea who they are introducing. Kacey Musgraves? Let me do some research. Please hold. Okay she is a new country artist. A singer-songwriter from Texas. She actually sounds pretty great and mad respect for just getting up there with her guitar. Rick just gave a minus 1 point for her nose ring but I still like her. This is the song she is singing. 8 out of 10. Probably best actual 'performance' of the night.
-Here is Will.I.Am. Talking about Madonna winning the top touring artist prize. I wonder if she will actually show? Nope just a video compilation from her last tour. Disappointing. Oh man she is there.. but seriously what the hell are you wearing!!! Rick calls her overrated, I can't argue with that but I do respect her for how long she has been doing it. She is acting pretty ridiculous up there. I'm over it.
-I have to admit I'm actually embarrassed that I am still watching this 90 min in; didn't think I'd last this long...
-Another person is on the stage that I don't recognize. She is here to introduce the Bieber. I agree with Rick in the sentiment "He could be my least favorite". Agreed. He is also missing a sleeve of his jacket. What happened Justin? He sounds/looks/acts terrible. Also another lip syncing performance. Kid Rock just took another shot. I give it a 3 out of 10.
-Top Album is next and if Adele doesn't beat out Taylor Swift and One Direction I will turn this off right now! Yup I'm out. Taylor Swift wins and while I won't argue its not a great album it does not beat out Adele. I'm out!! I will say I made it about 30 min longer than I first expected.
Goodnight.
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