Thursday, January 31, 2013

Goodbye 30 Rock.

Tonight will be a very sad night in my apartment. I have watched every single episode of 30 rock and tonight I am forced to say goodbye to Liz Lemon and crew. In all honesty this show has got to rank in the top 5 of smartest shows to ever exist. Its smart funny and too bad most of America missed out on this comedic gem, rather watching shows with quick laughs like The Big Bang Theory. Tina Fey's writing style was perfect for this show and the characters. I just don't know what I will do on Thursday nights unless they extend my other favorite Parks and Recreation to an hour (hint hint). 

My favorite is what Tina wrote in her book Bossypants about the show. And can't we all learn from this somehow?

“There is one other embarrassing secret I must reveal, something I’ve never admitted to anyone. Though we are grateful for the affection 30 Rock has received from critics and hipsters, we were actually trying to make a hit show. We weren’t trying to make a low-rated critical darling that snarled in the face of conventionality. We were trying to make Home Improvement and we did it wrong. You know those scientists who were developing a blood-pressure medicine and they accidentally invented Viagra? We were trying to make Viagra and we ended up with blood-pressure medicine.”

If 30 Rock is looked back upon at as a failure... then I never want to succeed in anything in my life!

I don't know how to pay tribute to this type of show so I will do it in two ways. One in a video clip of Liz Lemons best moments (any woman can relate to her) and the second will be some of my favorite quotes from the series last seven seasons.

“Affirmative action was designed to keep women and minorities in competition with each other to distract us while white dudes inject AIDS into our chicken nuggets.” – Tracy

“No, Tracy took advantage of my white guilt, which is supposed to be used only for good, like over-tipping and supporting Barack Obama.” – Liz

“I don’t have any money if that’s what you’re after. And I’m not one of those girls that does weird stuff in bed because they think they have to. If you’re a gay guy looking for a beard, I don’t do that anymore. And if you’re trying to harvest my organs and sell them, I have an uncle who’s a cop so don’t even try it.” – Liz

“Lemon, I would like to teach you something. I would like to be Michelle Pfeiffer to your angry black kid who learns that poetry is just another way to rap.” – Jack

“I believe that the moon does not exist. I believe that vampires are the world’s greatest golfers but their curse is they never get a chance to prove it. I believe that there are 31 letters in the white alphabet. Wait… what was the question?” – Tracy

“Boy, it’s crazy to think we used to settle questions of paternity by dunking a woman in water until she admitted she made it all up. Different time, the ’60s.” – Dr. Spaceman

“The Black Crusaders are a secret group of powerful Black Americans. Bill Cosby and Oprah Winfrey are the chief majors, but Jesse Jackson, Colin Powell and Gordon from Sesame Street, they’re members too, and they meet four times a year in the skull of the Statue of Liberty. You can read about that on the Interweb.” – Tracy

“Never go with a hippie to a second location.” – Jack

“Look how Greenzo’s testing! They love him in every demographic — colored people, broads, fairies, commies. Gosh we gotta update these forms.” – Jack

“Stop eating people’s old French fries, pigeon! Have some self respect! Don’t you know you can fly?” – Tracy

“If reality TV has taught us anything, it’s that you can’t keep people with no shame down.” – Liz

“Go to Disneyland? Lemon, I’ve held Walt Disney’s frozen head in my hands.” – Jack

“We have a show tonight. I’ve never missed a show. Not even the time I had that virus they kept saying only raccoons get.” – Liz

“The Kid’s Choice Awards? Fine, I’ll set aside my feud with Raven-SymonĂ© for one day, but she knows what she did.” – Jenna

“I know it’s a girl, Liz Lemon, because I yelled out ‘Susan B. Anthony’ at the moment of conception.” – Tracy

“You can do some serious subway flirting before you realize the guy is homeless.” – Liz

“Michael Kors is a friend — we own a gay racehorse together — and I convinced him to make wizard cloaks fashionable this winter.” – Jack

“My heart’s pounding like I’m watching Oprah’s farewell season.” – Liz

“I’m still smart enough to know that I’ll never do better than you Liz Lemon, cause you’re a cook in the bedroom and a whore in the kitchen.” – Dennis

“That sofa is made from Seabiscuit.” – Jack

“This is a nightmare. My nemeses — Abigail Breslin and that woman from those Progressive Insurance commercials — are in the audience.” – Jenna

“Come on Donaghy. You’ve skied Mount St. Helens, made eye contact with Michelle Bachman, been trapped under a boulder for 128 hours, you’re not scared of anything.” – Jack

“I feel like Oscar the Grouch today, and not just because I woke up in a garbage can this morning startling someone named Gordon.” – Tracy

“If you’re ordering me an edible arrangement to say thanks, I’d prefer a meat one.” Liz

“From now on you write and shoot the whole season in two weeks, likeWheel of Fortune or Fox News.” – Jack

“I assumed it was the bottle of wine with the card reading ‘Dear Doritos, what about just selling bags full of your dust? I could put it on chicken or fish…’” – Jack

Also click on this link HERE. Trust me.

Goodbye 30 Rock. I will one day own all your DVD's and figure out all of your jokes. :)

Final word from Tina Fey that she told her crew while filming the final scene "I hope you're so proud of the work that we did. Cause a lot of shows work long hours, but we worked hard during those long hours and what we made was really good. And it's gonna stand the test of time and you will all be home now to watch it in syndication on Fox"

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